Someone asked me not too long ago what a “normal” kid was. I didn’t have an answer as to what is “normal” but I did know what a discouraged child looked like. It was a child whose little self-esteem cup was empty. This child needed to display negative behaviors in order to get attention, to gain power, to get even and feel justified when hurt and to act helpless when the standards seemed to high to achieve. This child needed redirection through encouragement. Then I thought about the child that was well adjusted. A child that was resilient. I found that this child will display most of the following traits:

  • A true sense of self worth
  • A feeling of belonging
  • Socially acceptable goals
  • Meets the needs of the situation
  • Thinks in terms of “we” rather than “I”
  • Assumes responsibility
  • Demonstrates interest in others
  • Co-operates with others
  • Encourages others
  • Has the courage to try and fail
  • Has a willingness to share
  • Is honest
  • Puts forth genuine effort

Maybe “normal” is not something we need to be concerned about but perhaps we need to work towards the goal if raising a “well adjusted” child.